The 14 People You Meet At Ciren Parties* (*Also The Rock)

Oh Ciren parties… House parties, raucous 21sts, splendid hunt balls, Tythe nights and the general debauchery of the Rock (or ReVa if you are basically an embryo)… Whatever the occasion there are certain people you will always, always meet.


  1. Let’s get the disgusting out of the way and point out that there is usually one person who is sick at a party. Usually unidentified, they seldom make it to the loo.
  2. The social smoker. This person never has their own cigarettes, because they “don’t smoke.” Until that is they have a cheeky Smirnoff Ice on the Rock’s deal and can be found in the smoking cage, cadging ciggies off anyone and everyone.
  3. The sober one. Usually driving home to hunt the next day, or forced to chaperone their housemates.
  4. The listener. Whatever the occasion this person always, always attracts a Deep Meaningful Conversation. Usually an introvert with a dislike of loud noises, they love listening and advising more than partying. Chances are they’re lubricating their throats with champagne and will be too drunk to recall your conversation the following morning, making them the perfect confidante.
  5. The mover. You would never suspect it, but this person throws some terrific and unusual shapes on the dance floor. Farm machinery inspired grooving was once a common sight in the Rock… Alas it left with the dancer.


6. Someone who doesn’t *quite* get the dress code…

7. The Hedgehog. Generally drenched in beer and other things you don’t want to know about. Spotted in non- black tie events by the signature rugger shirt.

8. The Who Pulled Who celebrity. Every week. Without fail.

9. The one who really can’t handle their drink. Generally being carried out by a bouncer.

10. The one who drinks a whole bottle of vodka and still manages to stand upright.

11. The chain smoker. They disappear every ten minutes for a quick cig.

12. That person who wears the same outfit to every single party.

13. The one who is obsessed with dirty pints.

14. That person who goes from innocent chat to the most dirty sense of humour in the space of two glasses of wine.